marrige …
I got a huge shock last week … while i was enjoying my early dinner, my dad suddenly came and told me he had choose my future wife… of course I was shock and a bit disappointed … i didn’t say anything and continue finishing my dinner … suddenly the curry i ate taste sour …. after washing my hand in the kitchen i just walk slowly to my room and lie down on my bed thinking what the hell has got into my dad … knowing my dad, i knew he didn’t really meant what he say coz everytime he got this new ideas, he got excited and start talking about it ….
On the next day, me, mom and dad had lunch together again… in the middle of our lunch, he open THE issue again but this time he was calmer then yesterday … he told me that my sister and her boyfriend plan to get married around september this year … so since i’ll be finishing my study around that time so he plan to combine my wedding with hers … the problem is i don’t have a partner yet and so he told me he have 2 girls for me to choose … gosh what is this … 1960’s is it !!!! hahahahahahaah
Luckily dad understand me well .. so he didn’t force me to except .. he gave me the phone number of one of the girl … I decline his offer politely … the idea of getting marry is just not in my mind at the moment or atleast not anytime soon …
I talk to several close fren of mine about this … most of my guy fren laugh their troat out and as for my female fren.. some say i should go ahead and some say better don’t …
Do we marry a stranger … and then we learn to get to know our bride and hopefully we fall in love with her … Who among us are willing to take the risk ? Do we simply choose a women and get married ? I do realize that in Islam, we believe that love comes after marrige … What I’m trying to convey here is my preferrance, if I were to marry someone, I would prefer to marry someone I knew … Marrige is a life commitment … it involve two hearts and on a bigger picture, 2 family … Going back to the early phase of a relationship, where two people meet and fall in love … they fall in love because they have found someone meaningful to their life .. I belive when we fall for a girl and confess our love… we confess to a special person that we plan to marry … Hehehe .. perhaps as corny as it may sound … I actually belive in what I say … Finding the right person may take sometime … But I would rather live a single life waiting … PAtient is a virtue …
March 3rd, 2008 at 6:53 am
Dear Fahmy..eventhough u belive we people can fall in love after marriage..that is only those days..when u rarely meet people. These days..when u meet lots of people.. u came across characters u like and dislikes..u know how to differentiate people.. u know there someone there with noble characters and also something imperfect that suits u well..For me.. i rather stay alone and adopt a child than get married with someone I don’t love and force me to love.. its not something that we can build but its something that struck..it something that occur naturally but when it sruck u can’t bear to live without it..well fahmy, do not search for someone perfect as only god is perfect..search for someone that her imperfectness makes u miss her a lot.
March 3rd, 2008 at 6:23 pm
hey fahmy..go ahead call the girl..take the chance..u’ll never know ok..just dont decide to marry her so soon
i found this entry kinda cute & sweet somehow hehehe
March 5th, 2008 at 7:52 am
Hi corn .. Thank you for your comment .. I think you got the wrong impression of my writing …. Not getting married and have an adopted child kind of taking it a bit too far i guess .. There are lots of issue unvolving unmarried person ….medically we’re concern about breast cancer and endometrial cancer … In every principle or paradigm we hold, there is always a limitation in term of living up to it … The only absolute principle to me is always based on the teaching of Islam …
March 5th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
so u mean.. not married will increased the risk of having those type of cancer..is..it? Well then, must get married soon..Yup.. u are right.The prophet urged us to get married..its one of his Sunnah. But fahmi.. some people don’t want to simply marry a person because they need to get married.Sometimes they really like someone, its just the fate that against the relationship.. As a resolution to that dissapointment, choose to stay single rather than marrying someone. But if ur father choose the girl, might be something interesting bout her. Go on and try it.. God is great. Love is from Allah.. HE might give u the love u r searching. Overall its worth trying if she’s the one.
March 14th, 2008 at 10:49 am
hahahaha…
fahmy, sorry again for dropping by and point out opinion that you might not really expect… well, this situation where parents or even relatives promoting significant other at certain age we’re at is common in these era. it is some what way they think, is things that they could do to help us… thinking that we might have insufficient linkage of friends… knowing that we keep on hanging with certain chain of friends. i also face the same problem here where by family members are so eager to make me settle. it is not the issue of settling down itself but finding a perfect match to settle down is not that simple. maybe some people think that we can learn to accept anyone that came into our life to live with but for me such things does not exist. it is good to get to know but if you think that it will not work at the first place, why even try? trying will end up heart-ache… the worst part is that, if you feel like that person does not suit you… how to explain that you’re not interested? any idea?